I was kind of fooling myself with the optimism when it came to my knees injury.
I knew it the other day when I typed that I was just as committed to my dream. Because I knew that I wasn’t. I knew this had tripped me up.
I don’t know what I could have done differently to feel more committed. I was icing and resting and keeping my leg elevated. On the surface, that all feels very proactive. Digging deeper though, honestly, it just doesn’t feel like enough.
Perhaps that’s a mindset thing I need to look at. The things I was doing felt proactive enough, but somewhere else in my mind, I had already dropped the immediate possibility of training.
That hurts to think about. That no weather or family obstacle could shake me, but I hurt myself and suddenly all was lost.
Today I woke up with no pain and that was amazing. It hasn’t been a pain-free day, but it’s been better enough to give me hope. And to provide the opportunity to recognize old mindset thoughts. Thoughts that I then followed up with sabotaging behaviors.
Tomorrow my Merrells come and wearing them should go a long way in helping me heal. I’ll pay more attention to my triggers so that my response to them doesn’t have to be my same ol’ same ol’. I’m more than that.