A chance that they will see.

Yesterday got scary for a little bit healthwise and I wanted to write. Time did not allow. Once the scary wore off a bit, regular life ensued and I still didn’t write. Then I had planned to today, but I decluttered for hours instead.

Now it is late and I’m falling asleep, but I just want to say, before I disappear for the night, I love being alive. I love living. I love all the easy and all the hard and all the beautiful and all the sad and scary and dark. I love the light.

I love holes in socks and stomp stomp stomp. I love cuddles and hugs and resting my head on any of my family. I love all the song lyrics and movie quotes. I love the goodness.

I love being alive. And for a moment yesterday,  I had to experience the “what if this is it?” moment. And it sucked. I love this life a lot. I’m not ready for it to end.

Maybe one day I will have some peace with that. For now, I bathe in gratitude that I am still here.